D2 – Divorce Depression. Divorce can cause depression, sadness or a lack of our own self-esteem. We wonder what went wrong, what we could have done differently, and why we didn’t see it coming or ignored the signs. Whether we were the ones that left the marriage for the marriage left us, we need to establish a new lifestyle, and we want to make sure we’re healthy for our children as we re-create our lives.
The first thing we have to realize is that we did the best we could have done with what we knew at the time. Being hard on ourselves doesn’t help anybody; we have to teach by example and children watch our every move and reaction most of the time, when problems arise.
Children also tend to take things personally – thinking they caused it or they can fix it. We have to make sure we remain the grown-up in the family and yet find time to heal and get our self-esteem back. Sometimes when we are feeling low, we can disappear into the darkened corner of our bedroom or become a child ourselves. It is important to find support and strengthen ourselves from the inside out, so we are strong enough to move through our feelings and create a new life for ourselves.
Knowing we had done the best we could in the situation, letting go of the past and moving forward (with lessons learned), and creating a game plan for our new lives can begin the recovery – getting our own selves back. It is easy to lose or forget about who we are when we raise a family and especially when we go through a divorce or separation. It is important to know the signs we have lost our way and to discover ways to find our way back to ourselves. If we don’t get our emotions out, they can manifest in our physical bodies and cause dis-ease or illness.
Tips recovering your self-esteem…from Divorce Magazine.