Depression is a common emotion when we are facing or moving through a divorce. It’s important that you do something about it because your child is going to look to you for support.
When I get in a confused state, I often write a letter to my future self – an affirming pep talk so to speak. If you feel like you have no future, you cannot create one for yourself and be there in your body for your child or children. I visualize myself in a good place and write down all the things I want to do with my life, and what I want to create.
Whether it’s traveling to a place I have never been, getting healthy and ready for a new relationship one day (there is a healing time that needs to take place so we are healthier and ready to bring in a person that is healthy too). Once we have things to feel positive and excited about, we can get ourselves off the sofa or out of the bed and begin to live our lives.
The last thing we want, as parents, is for our children to be afraid for us or think they have to take care of us. Many children of divorce end of feeling that have to take care of their parent, and it’s here where a child can lose years of their childhood. We do not want that to happen, you see it in children of an alcoholic parent, a depressed parent or a parent that has lost hope in the financial and emotions roller coaster of divorce.
So, get out a notebook and start rewriting your story, begin to plan our your new life with exciting new adventures: a wish list or bullet points of what you want to create for yourself and your children. Find support with a therapist or close friend if need it, a lot of us have been where you, are and are willing and able to help you move past the depression, fear and numbness you might be feeling.
You owe it to yourself!